An empathic conversation
is a conversation
where two things happen
1. you feel heard
2. you see what you could not see before
- you want others to feel heard
- you want to see what you could not see before
Author: Seung Chan Lim
System vs Individual
Managing individuals
is different
from managing a system.
Its easy to confuse
system
with infrastructure
To better understand,
imagine managing a garden
instead of managing a machine
Not Feeling
Why talk about unpleasant things
when we dont have enough time
for pleasant things
is often an effective way
of numbing ourselves
from experiencing
then processing the unplesant emotions
which provides insight into what is really going on
Wonder
Sometimes
curiosity
contains
judgment.
When we remove such judgment
what we are left with
is pure
wonder.
May you stay
wonderful.
Playing to Win vs Playing to Lose
Start with the win
then work your way
back.
OTherwise
you can get stuck
wondering how you can
not lose.
Assume winning
is inevitable,
then come up with an explanation
that supporrs
that is worth a shot
Intent vs Impact
With care
and compassion,
I looked at my child
wanting to fix
what may be broke.
Maybe his trousers were unbuckled.
Maybe his socks weren’t up.
Maybe his hairs aren’t combed.
Having realized empathy,
I now appreciate
the fact
that all they saw
was my critical face.
Money
Earning money
because we think it means
“success”
is very different
from earning money
because we feel responsible
for someone to whom
the money
means support.
A Move Ive Seen
If we can predict
what someone will say
in response to us,
and that response is negative
it is no wonder we will not act
Each and every time you respond to
something your employee says
that image is store in the person’s memory
repeat the same thing enough times
and it’s as if there is no chance of. different response.
The New
When people encounter
something new
or unexpected.
Some
will dislike it.
Because it won’t fit
their expectations.
So to reduce their dissonance,
they’ll come up with ways
to make it fit
by suggesting ways
to fix it.
…
But then
some
will like it.
But they’ll be unable
to articulate
why.
Because it won’t fit
their expectations,
either.
The difference
isthe latter group of people
will imagine a context
in which the new will fit
while the former
will try to fix the new
to fit the existing context.
When there is more of the latter group
than the former,
a new genre
a new platform
a new era
begins.
If there is more of the former group
than the latter
a cult classic
is born.
Regardless,
an artist
makes art
that defies evaluation.
To be an Individual
To be and individual
does not stop
at the soverignty
of the undividable
is to be not enough
it is in company
with others
that what we lack
is fulfilled