What if
“to overcome”
simply means
to learn the choice
to look back at,
with genuine appreciation,
a past event
we once judged
negatively.
Tag: Judgment
Same Team
When someone
is striving toward a goal,
dissuading them from the goal
can be the very definition
of being
unsupportive.
We can rationalize why
we are right
to dissuade them.
We may even argue
that it’s for their own
good.
What doesn‘t change—
until their goal changes—
is that we are perceived
as unsupportive
to them,
and thus perceived
to not be
on the same
team.
Resentment vs Wonder
Resentment may judge
“I shouldn’t have to
do that.”
Wonder may ask
“I wonder what I can do
instead?”
Selfishness
When we judge ourselves
as selfish,
it is often nothing more
than a symptom
of our fear of being judged
by others
as selfish.
Lost
We are only
“lost”
in relation to
where we want
to go.
If we don’t know
where we want
to go,
we may instead be
faced with an opportunity
for exploration
and play.
Unless,
of course,
we think we know
where we want
to go,
because we conflate
where we want
to go
with where we think
we should want
to go.
In which case,
we may still feel
“lost.”
Beyond Judgment
Judgment
Withness
“When
did you start losing
trust
in the CTO?” I asked
the CEO.
“Our 3rd co-founder
was underperforming.
He came to us one day
to explain
that his underperformance
was due
to his father’s
illness.”
he answered.
“After he left,
the CTO told me in private
that he believed
that
was just an excuse.”
he continued.
“Sure,
it may have been
an excuse.
But the 3 of us
had been friends
for 10 years
before founding
the company.
I could easily see
how the CTO
would judge me the same way
if I were in a pinch.
…
I no longer felt
she was with me.”
he concluded.
Weak
Sometimes
“weak”
is merely us judging
someone’s pain
as unworthy
of appreciation.
When “Wrong” Expires
When a decision
leads to something
“bad,”
we call it
“wrong.”
Until the same decision
leads to something
“good.”
Then
we call it
the “best.”