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Am I Doing Enough?
Sometimes
asking ourselves
am I doing enough
may mean
that we dont have enough trust
in the people around us
to do their share.
Some results need to be achived
and if we are not the one who can achieve those results
but they can only be achieved through others
or we’d rather have others achieve those results
So the question isn’t am I doing enough
the question is
who can I entrust to do something
that I am not doing
or I am not good at doing
or I do not want to do.
Rejection
What cold outreach taught me
was that what people are doing
is not rejecting me.
What they are doing
is saying things to me.
It is I who choose
to interpret their words
as rejection
or as something else.
From their perspective,
they may be feeling misunderstood
take advantage of, etc…
Method vs Context
Sometimes,
we think our method of communication
sucks.
Maybe.
But before the method
there is
relationship.
It is in the relationship,
where emotions
such as trust
reside.
If the relationship is sound,
the method can matter
less.
If the relationship is unsound
the method
Respecting vs Expecting – Part 2
If to respect,
is to see
anew,
expect is to see
as formerly seen.
When we respect someone,
we don’t blame them
for not doing what we wanted them to do
we remind them
that they did not do what they know they can do.
Need vs Form
If we do
or say things
to fulfill a need,
then we form our objects,
organizations,
and rituals
to fulfill that need.
Yet,
the words,
the behaviors,
and the forms of our objects
and organizations
can mislead us,
if we fail to comprehend
and appreciate
the underlying needs
that shaped it.
Tis
how easily
dogma
is born.
The Cult of Gratitude
Gratitude
has somehow became
a panacea.
“Be grateful.”
some say.
“Be honest.”
I say in response.
If you don’t feel gratitude,
you don’t feel gratitude.
What you feel
is what you feel.
Irony
I lack empathy.
Sometimes.
We all lack empathy.
Sometimes.
Let those
who’s never lacked empathy,
judge others
for lacking empathy.
Let those
who’s never seen others lack empathy,
judge themselves
for lacking empathy.
Complaining
It’s ok
to complain.
In fact,
it can be healthy.
Except,
complain to someone
with skills.
The skills to summarize your complaint
far more succinctly
than you could
alone.
The skills to organize your complaint
far more clearly
than you could
alone.
The skills to guide your complaint
toward a resolution
you couldn’t reach
alone.
May we neither waste our complaint
on people who lack
such skills.
Nor leave such people frustrated
for lacking
such skills.
Playing Your Game
Stop playing to grow.
That’s your investors’ game.
Stop playing to survive.
That’s playing not to lose.
Start playing to win.
And play your own game.
Lacking Empathy is Normal
100% of the CEOs
who bragged to me
about their exceptional empathy
were proven wrong
when I asked
their direct reports
and their family members.
Not because they lacked empathy
absolutely,
but because we all lack empathy
sometimes.
Except,
that sometime
may be a critical moment for some
enough for them to remember
that we were not there
when they needed us
to be there for them
the most.