What if Irony is Judging Others for Lacking Empathy?
If we have an outcome
we want to see happen
by hiring,
not merely a job description
to match,
may we take responsibility
for clarifying and communicating
what that is.
If we wish to fulfill the purpose
for having been hired
instead of merely offering skills
and completing tasks,
may we take responsibility
for discovering and clarifying
what outcome
we were hired
to realize.
The quicker
we free ourselves of the judgment
that we are doing something
for
others
and admit
that we are doing something
because we feel
pleasant emotions
knowing what we did
mattered to others,
the quicker we can go beyond
the dualistic paradigm
of selfish
vs altruistic
and begin the creation
of a virtuous cycle
or the destruction
of a vicious cycle.
When someone,
who has been doing their best
to be strong,
is told
to “be strong,”
it can be interpreted to mean
“your strength
is not enough.”
When sharing our stories
we sometimes also share
the weight we carry
as the sole bearer
of our stories.
Trust
implies vulnerability.
Expectation
demands certainty.
To lose trust
because of our violated
expectations
is to forget what it means
to trust.
Or to realize
that from the start,
there was no trust,
just unmanaged
expectations.
When we hyper-empathize
we can conflate
what is in our own best interest
with what is in the best interest
of the other
with which
we hyper-empathize.
That other
maybe our company,
our children,
or any number
of “others.”
Doing our best
requires clarity,
acceptance,
and appreciation
of our own
limits.
Otherwise
we may confuse our best
with someone else’s:
someone
with different
limits.
Such confusion
can give rise to shame
and doubt,
preventing us
from doing our
best.
Sometimes,
we discover in hindsight,
that we have wasted our energy
on a distraction.
When this happens,
it may be easy to blame ourselves
for not having had
foresight.
But without a clear direction,
what counts as distraction
and what does not
may only become obvious
in hindsight.
To decide with foresight
may we gain clarity of direction
first
to helps us discern
what counts as distraction
and what does not.
May we choose
to take responsibility
instead of blaming ourselves.
“What is the point
of life?”
we sometimes
ask.
May we not forget
that we can also ask
“What is the circle
of life?”
or
“What is the sphere
of life?”
We need not choose
to limit our lives
to a point.
In the creative process,
when someone asks
“What are you making?”
an honest answer
is often times
“I don’t know.”
And yet,
we sometimes
make up an answer
and take offense
when others
do not understand,
while we ourselves
also
do not understand,
which means others
cannot understand.
