What if Irony is Judging Others for Lacking Empathy?
No two “things”
can ever be
the same.
Especially if we consider
their location
in time
and space.
So when we hear someone say
“it’s the same thing,”
and we disagree,
we have at least
two choices.
We can argue why they’re not
the same.
We can also discover their perspective,
which is focusing on a similarity
between two or more things
that they value enough
to say “it’s the same thing.”
The choice
is ours
and ours only.
May we take responsibility
for our choices.
The purpose of coaching
is to help you
win.
Its not
to heal.
Nor is It
to change.
If healing is necessary
to win
then so be it.
If change is necessary
to win
then so be it.
But those are only means
to an end.
Low tension
Creative tension
Destructive tension
is where tension ha sustained
People are not rejecting us
They don’t want to sacrifice
for their time
money
or whatever else they have.
They are not our enemy
They are merely people taking responsibility for themselves
As we age
we may realize
that what we once considered
“old“
is “young”,
while what we once considered
“young”
is younger.
Our parents
can have the best of intentions
and yet
hurt us
in unimaginable ways.
Our
“I overreacted today.”
said the CEO.
I waited.
“They think
I’m a bad leader.” he continued.
I waited.
“They think
I’m toxic.” he continued.
“I don’t know
why I cannot control this.”
he lamented.
“How could others support you
so that you won’t overreact?”
I asked
finally.
“I don’t know.”
he replied.
“What do you not
want?”
I asked again.
“I want them
to stop saying why my ideas
are bad.”
he said.
“Do you want them
to say your ideas
are good?”
I asked.
“No,
of course not.”
he said.
“What do you want?”
I asked again.
“I…
I just want them
to listen.”
he said,
finally.
When someone praises us
we are confronted
with our own beliefs.
If we believe
we are worthy of the praise
the praise
is received
If we do not
the praise
is rejected.
The praise
is a mirror
What if the difference
between
skepticism
and curiosity
is the presence
vs absence
of judgment?
“I want to achieve
peace in my family.”
“I want my team members
to be happy.”
“I want …”
While these can be goals,
aspirations,
or expectations,
they cannot be
our responsibility.
Not because we don’t care
or because we have no influence,
but because
responsibility
does not equal
outcome.
What is within our responsibility
is to do our best.
Sometimes our best
does not yield
an outcome
we find satisfying.
Our responsibility lies
is what response we choose
in relation to the outcome
we do not find satisfying.
