What if Irony is Judging Others for Lacking Empathy?
When we realize empathy
what we see
changes.
When what we see
changes
what we focus on
can also change.
When what we focus on
changes
what we value
can also change.
When what we value
changes
what we decide
can also change.
When what we decide
changes
what we do
can also change.
If fear accompanies
the prediction
of a negative future event,
we fear
in so far as we believe
we’ll live past
the negative future
event.
Once we realize
that we may die
prior
to the negative future event
much can change.
Much will change,
when we are willing
and able
to help others feel understood
to the same degree
with which we
want to feel understood.
Much will change
when we are willing
and able
to provide what others need,
instead of what we think
they should need.
Sometimes
that which prevents us
from realizing empathy
is our desire
to change the world
for the better.
There’s a meme on how lobsters grow
by shedding their rigid shell and producing a new one.
It points out that before it can grow,
a lobster feels stress against their shell.
Thus, the moral of the story is:
1) Treating stress as a problem to be solved is to prevent growth.
2) Stress can be a sign of growth.
What it skims through, though,
is how lobsters need a rock
to protect itself from predators
before it can shed its shell.
So if our client, employee, boss, or partner
seems to be unwilling to let go of their shell,
or to grow & innovate,
the question isn’t “Why are they being so rigid?!”
It’s “Do we have a rock in place?”
Let me know if you’re willing to be a rock.
We often say “People don’t change.”
What we mean is people don’t change the way we want them to change.
People change the way they are motivated to change.
One of the quickest ways to feel frustrated is to coerce other people to change based on our own value system.
One of the most effective ways of sustaining that frustration is to rationalize why our own value system should be universal.
