Seung Chan Lim

The Other Side of Cannot

“That’s not
something I can do…”
may simply be
an incomplete sentence,
implying the ending
“…without support.”

“This
will be
your second exit.”
I remarked.

“What will you do
next?” I asked.

“Now
I want to live
my own life.” answered
the founder.

“Whose life
have you been living?”
I asked.

“The investors’.”
he answered
without hesitation.

“What has been
one of the biggest
lessons you’ve learned
this year
as a coach?” he asked.

“That it’s ok
to cry
with clients.”
I replied.

At first,
I assumed people hurt others
with malicious intent.

Then I learned,
most people are hurt
by people
with good intentions.

People
who cared
and had compassion
for them.

People
close to them.

People
who told them
“This
is for your own
good.”

One way
to discuss privilege
is to focus on the burden of gifts
others
have given us.

Wealth,
Opportunity,
Access…

Another way
to discuss privilege
is to focus on the gifts
we have
to give.

We cannot always force others
to give their gifts
to people
other
than ourselves.

But we can give
our own gifts
to anyone
we choose.

Perfection
is a feeling.

What is perfect
to one
is imperfect
to another.

What is perfect
one day
is not perfect
the next.

We can misunderstand perfection
if we focus solely
on clarifying the measurement
of perfection.

We can better understand perfection
by clarifying the tension
underlying the drive
for perfection.