Secret

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Why
do you look
like you have no anxiety
or worry?

asked the founder.

I have anxiety
and worry,
its just that
I can share every single one of them
with my wife

Without her
I’d be nothing.

Pre-Self

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Once upon
a time,
we were not merely an individual,
but a part of our mother.

The physical separation
between
our so-called “self”
and our mother
was not so clear.

Which implies
that “self”
is a learned
and developed concept.

Then the question remains.

What is the platform
that existed prior to the concept

Of self
is the concept of self
standing on

Withness 2

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“My wife
is driving me crazy.”
said the Founder.

“Why?”
I asked.

“She asks me questions.
I give her the answer
and she says she doesn’t want
my answer.”

“Have you ever sent an email
in the middle of the night
to one of your executive team members
not expecting an immediate reply
but because you want to stay on the same page
and if you didn’t tell him now
you may forget?”
I asked

“Sure.”
answered the founder.

Has anyone complained that you’re sending emails late at night
because they thought they had to respond to your email right away?

“Sure. So I told them I don’t want them to answer right away.”
answered the founder.

“What if your wife
is doing the same?”
I asked.

That she’s just sharing because
it matters to her that she shares this
because there may be a time later when this info
not too important now
could matter
and she doesn’t want to have to remember to go all the way back
and share all the background before talking about something she wants to talk about
it’s just a much more efficient use of energy
to maintain updated shared context.

Semantics

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Oftentimes
all we disagree on
is the definition
of a word.

If we are willing to use
the other persons definition
we may agree
if we are unwilling
then we disagree.

The question then beceoms
what are we afraid would happen
if we let the other person
use their definition?

Either vs Both

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“Your intention doesn’t matter!”
shouted
the CTO.

“Yes, it does!”
shouted back
the CEO.

“What matters
is the impact!”
shouted back
the CTO.

“Stop.”
I interrupted.

“What
is preventing them both
from mattering?”
I asked.

Fear

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We think fear
is spiders,
ghosts,
or heights.

Fear
is also
the tiny voice we hear
that says
“but that’s unprofessional,”
“I shouldn’t cry,”
or “that’s not right.”

Craft vs Manufacturing

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“I keep learning
the same lesson
over
and over
and over again.”
said the founder.

“I don’t know what
is wrong with me.”
she lamented.

“May I share a story?”
I asked.

“Yes, of course.”
said the founder.

“Before I went to art school,”
I began.

“I thought craft
was outdated.
After all,
craft
makes you repeat yourself
over
and over
and over again.
…
Why do craft,
when we have machines?’”
I explained.

“That makes sense.”
said the founder.

“Then I learned
that life
is a craft.

There is no machine
that can live
for us.

If it did,
it would no longer be
our lives.

Yes,
craft makes us
repeat ourselves
over
and over
and over again.

But that
is life.

What craft does
is it trains us
to learn
from the repetition.

Lacking Empathy

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“Do you think
I lack
empathy?”
asked the founder.

“You’re not receiving
enough
support.”
I responded.

“What do you mean?”
asked the founder.

“You’re going to be stressed without support, because you feeel isolated, if you’re isolated, you ahve no room in your being to empathize.